Wolfe on Women

"It has been many years since any woman has slept under this roof. Not that I disapprove of them, except when they attempt to function as domestic animals. When they stick to the vocations for which they are best adapted, such as chicanery, sophistry, self-adornment, cajolery, mystification and incubation, they are sometimes splendid creatures."

- Nero Wolfe, The Rubber Band (1936) pg. 94

"Not like women? They are astounding and successful animals."

-Nero Wolfe, Too Many Cooks (1938) p. 107

Wolfe has always seemed remarkable to me. I've been enthralled with the way he views one whole half of the species. There is a second, better example of this train of thought, in a later book. I'm working my way through another rereading, this time meticulously hunting for that quote.

I finally found it but forgot to write down which book, "Orchids were his concubines, insipid, expensive, parasitic and temperamental." I think Archie actually says it, but the thought is the same: Wolfe has flowers so that he can avoid having a woman.

The main impression that you get from Wolfe is that he doesn't hate women, he merely disapproves of their abilities insofar as they interfere with his life. Even his cleaning staff are a troupe of males. I was recently reading Over My Dead Body and it was such an interesting avenue for his disdain to explore. Now that he has a "shapely responsibility" to consider, he doesn't seem to change his thoughts in the slightest. It probably doesn't help that this particular example is a walking example of his prejudices.

In any case, this mentality just fascinated me since it was obviously designed by a man who didn't appear to hate women (Rex Stout). More so, this came about in an era where women were not often seen as capable of anything, certainly not something complicated like mystification. This was such a unique view to have at this point in time, because even though it is clear that Wolfe wants women nowhere near his home, he still respects their inherent danger.

This led me to have a really interesting thought, on the nature of women as Wolfe might see them in the light of the 21st century.

Women are feline by nature. If they are born with domestic inclinations, then they may be quite happy with a domesticated existence, much like the indoor house cat. They might enjoy the freedom of being an outdoor cat, running around before always returning home to familiar surroundings. If they are born feral, you will only get yourself hurt trying to capture them. If they are born wild like a lioness, they can never truly be domesticated. They can have their spirit broken and become even more dangerous. Once you have failed to dominate this apex predator, you can never turn your back on them.

Experience, Guided By Intellegence

I have read the new Nero Wolfe novels, which continued the story after Rex Stout passed away. They are interesting stories, and anyone who loves Wolfe wants him to continue having adventures, but it's just not quite the same.

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle wrote Sherlock Holmes, and he was brilliant. Millions of others have borrowed him since Sir Arthur made him public domain, and he remains brilliant. I believe this is because as smart as Holmes was, he was not smart about people. Writing a character that understands humanity and chooses to keep himself insulated through staff, blubber and scheduling requires a passionate love for not only the character but his fellow man as well.

Wolfe is not thorny because he hates, he is thorny because he loves. He often comments that his pounds are insulation against feelings. He must remain aloof because his romantic nature would drive him to ruin, and likely has in the past.

The newer books lack this heart. They are pastiches, wonderful pastiches, and credit is due to anyone who takes up the mantle of a character they did not create, and therefore cannot know intimately. I often think that is why Sherlock is so easy to scribe for. We did know know him well, and thus, he can be the shell for a variety of fillings.

Wolfe does not share that expansiveness. We know him. But we do not know him as well as Rex Stout did. The same problem applies to Archie. New efforts have made Archie sound false. In reading the prequel story, all I could think the entire time was, "No. This is not Archie." I just feel that the Wolfe we read in the new novels is a zombie. The body is there, the actions correct, the schedule maintained, but the heart, the life, is missing.

I hesitate to mention brains so closely after a zombie comment, but I think that's the other problem. Rex Stout was a genius and a chameleon, living many lives during his time on this planet. He could write Wolfe because he knew, intimately, how Wolfe, a difficult genius, would behave. Writing the life of a genius is a difficult task, but writing for a genius that is not your own creation may be impossible. I believe that is why the newer novels focus so heavily on Archie Goodwin, the 'every-man' character. And while Archie is a great foil and narrator, respectfully, he is not why I read Nero Wolfe.

Author's Note:
I want to end with a statement that this is in no way a criticism of the new author that took over the Nero Wolfe novels. I applaud the effort and I am thankful Wolfe is allowed to live on, regardless of how. Please, read these books if you get a chance, they are definitely worth your time. This post was merely trying to explain a certain sadness I felt recently when reading the newer work.

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Happy Birthday Archie Goodwin!

Since this is Girl Week, who could resist ending it with a celebration?

I love celebrating fictional birthdays. Mostly because I don't have to buy any presents.

But this one is special. It's Archie Goodwin's birthday. Wolfe gives him a beautiful bill fold, Cattleya orchids on one side, 52 Colt automatics on the other. Archie would trade it for New York City, if you "threw in a couple of the nicer suburbs". I'm sure Fritz made the best cake ever to celebrate.

This is just another great example of Wolfe taking the time to actually show the appreciation he clearly feels for the work that Archie does. It's a great time for us to appreciate all of the joy we get from reading Nero Wolfe, since without Archie, the books would be rather boring.

So, grab a slice of cake, a Nero Wolfe novel and wish Mr. Goodwin a very happy birthday.

Some Buried Caesar by Rex Stout

I've been rereading Some Buried Caesar today and I found one of my favorite, seminal "Archie" quotes. Since it is Sunday, and technically I don't have anything scheduled, I thought it would be fun to just do a quick graphic and give Archie some long overdue quotation spotlight.

Lies Gracefully

There are times... when no one says it better than Nero. I can honestly say if I died tomorrow and needed an epitaph, I could not do better than "Lies Gracefully".

As a writer, lying is kind of what we do. The idea that I could be thought of as a graceful liar is entirely pleasing. I think that most writers would think of themselves as "Successful Liars" or "Accomplished Truthstretchers". It's all a matter of perspective. For me, grace has always been something I've cherished. It seemed important somehow, even as a young child that being graceful was a quality I should strive to achieve. On some days, I like to think I even attain that lofty goal.

When it comes to lying, I can't imagine a better way to lie, than "gracefully". Seeing as how it would be on my headstone while I was laid below, the double entendre seems apropos.